Message ID: bog09p$1e7iom$1@ID-202214.news.uni-berlin.de
I didn't care for your response to the couple that was invited to a wedding and the invitation didn't include their children. Contrary to what most people think, there are still some of us who enjoy spending time with our children. We don't get a lot of time during the week, so weekends are family time.
If there is a wedding and the bridal couple doesn't want my kids there, I refuse to attend. One day, this couple might be lucky enough to have children, and they will want to take them everywhere they go. Why don't you tell your readers it's OK to bring the kids?
-- Love My Kids in Louisville, Ky.
Dear Louisville:
Because it's NOT OK to bring your kids if their names are not on the invitation. We know you love them, but you don't get to select the guest list for someone else's event. The bride and groom decide who comes to their ceremony. The folks who are paying for the reception decide how many people they can afford to entertain. If they want the whole family present, great. If not, that's their choice.
If you cannot bear to leave your children with a sitter for a few hours, you are entitled to turn down the invitation so you can stay home with them. You are NOT entitled to rearrange the guest list and drag them along.
We heard from plenty of readers on this subject. One letter was from a woman who expected her grown, married children to be invited to every event she attended. Get real. Please, folks, children are precious, but it is presumptuous to demand that others accommodate them. We aren't asking you to like it. We are asking that you be considerate of the bridal couple on their wedding day.
Some brides offer baby-sitting near the ceremony, which is helpful, and we recommend it. If you can't find a sitter, don't want a sitter or believe you are entitled to bring along your children because your wishes are more important than the bride and groom's, then stay home. Here's the last word:
Dear Annie:
This is in response to "Guests with Children," who were upset because their kids weren't invited to a wedding. THANK YOU, ANNIE!! I am getting married next year and would love to send a copy of your response to all the guests who have children. I'm tired of parents giving me a guilt trip because I want my wedding to be an "adults only" affair.
I'll be happy to entertain them with their children when we get back from our honeymoon.
-- Canyon Lake, Calif.
I think you have something confused here. Allow me to clarify, and hopefully your self-centered little mind can wrap itself around these concepts:
1. It's not your wedding. Your wishes do not enter into the equation. The Bridal Couple are in no way obligated to accommodate your children.
2. You are not paying for it.
3. You may want to spend your time around children, but not everyone does, and nor do they have to.
You say weekend time is family time. So? Spend it with your children if you so desire. It does not give you the right to bully, blackmail and whine if there are functions where your children are not invited.
Having children does not give you the right to be rude, inconsiderate or entitlement-minded. Unfortunately most breeders, yourself included, cannot seem to grasp this simple fact.
GET THIS, AND GET IT NOW:
THE WORLD DOES NOT REVOLVE AROUND YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN.
No one is obligated to bow down before the holy shrine of your working genitalia.
If you cannot bear to be separated from your offspring for a couple of hours, then do everyone a favour and stay home. You won't be missed.
Childfree Abby
The ChildFree Abby Archives - http://www.dismal-light.net/childfreeabby/