Childfree Abby - I Am A Pathetic Loser23 October 2005Message ID: 11ln918qbkp339d@news.supernews.com
Dear Annie: My girlfriend and I are both 34 and have been dating for three years. "Sheri" does not work and rarely gets up before 1 in the afternoon. She lives in a house that her family owns and receives child support from her ex-husband. She also has me to pay her bills. I am totally devoted to Sheri and love her son as my own. The problem is for the past three years, I have been taken advantage of. My family and friends are sick of talking to me about Sheri. They think I am crazy for wanting to be with a woman who steps on me. Every time she hurts me, I swear I'll never go back, but I always do. It's like an addiction. For example, several months ago, my grandfather died suddenly. Sheri refused to attend the funeral, and while I was at the service, she used my credit card to order $5,000 worth of clothes online. I forgave her. She said she wanted to get married, so I bought our wedding rings. The day after booking the hall, Sheri picked a fight. Now I find myself on the bottom of the roller coaster again, wondering why I want to be with someone who hurts me so much. What is wrong with me? -- Loving and Hardheaded in Wyoming
Dear Hardheaded: You already know -- you like being needed, you can't admit you made a mistake, and underneath it all, you don't think you deserve better. You are enabling Sheri's manipulative behaviour. You want to be her knight in shining armour. She sees you as an easy mark. Consider counseling to learn why you think so little of yourself and how to form healthier relationships. Good luck.
Dear Bonehead, I really don't think that I am going to tell you something that you don't already know and everyone in your life has already told you. Sheri doesn't love you. If you want proof of this, stop paying her bills and see how fast she drops you in favour of the next poor slob. I frankly doubt that she loves anyone or has the ability to love anyone. People in her world view only exist to serve her whims - and you, sucker, are at the top of that list. Why do you do this? Maybe you just like the pain. Trust me, there are better ways to live out this fantasy than hooking up with this nutcase. Be grateful she did pick a fight with you after you booked the hall. She is vicious, spiteful and certainly has psychopathic tendencies. If you want really want to "save" something - volunteer at the local animal shelter. I guarantee that it will be a lot more gratifying and a lot less painful, certainly less expensive. Walk out the door and keep walking.
Childfree Abby
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