Childfree Abby - A Question of Ettiquette

02 January 2006

Message ID: 11rii9fjcbh29b@news.supernews.com

DEAR ABBY:

We recently moved and would like to meet more of our new neighbors by inviting them for wine and cheese.

However, many of the nearby residents are young parents with small children, and I do not relish merlot and brie spilled onto our new white carpets by visiting toddlers who may be into rough-and-tumble games.

Can you suggest a firm but polite way to say, "Please come, but leave the kids at home"? Help!
-- FLORIDA READER

DEAR READER:
Allow me to offer some suggestions. First, schedule the party from 8 to 9 p.m., which will better the chances that it will be past the little ones' bedtime. Second, when you invite these neighbors, state that alcohol will be served and the party is for adults only. And last, just in case some of your guests show up with children in tow anyway (it does happen), skip the merlot and serve white wine.

Gentle Reader,

Childfree Abby notes that you have done everything within your power to ward children from your home on the night of your fete. It is an acknowledged fact that invitations are only for those to whom they are addressed. However, it is also a fact that parents are unbelievably dense when it comes to their own offspring, and cannot truly comprehend that someone might not be truly and utterly thrilled at the thought of spending an evening in the company of said offspring.

That said, ChildFree Abby agrees with the advice of her esteemed counterpart with regards to the scheduling and specifying "adults only". However, ChildFree Abby would also suggest this if some are boorish enough to arrive with offspring in tow:

Greet them at the door with:

"Oh, how nice of you to stop by to welcome us to the neighbourhood. But I see you've kept the little ones up past their bedtime! Thank you, but that was just not necessary. We understand that you can't stay, but thank you again, and good night!"

Childfree Abby
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